Dis-May

It has been more than a month since I've updated anything here from my last ladies post. Sort of feeling tetchy if I don't post for a month. And if this trend continues then you can expect that this blog from Rock is heading for the rocks like any other. All this BS explanation happens only when you don't get time or you are occupied with things that are more important than barking here in this empty space.

Work wise it is little ok. Getting a sinking feeling here. Heck when did I ever talk about work in this stupid space. Taking some time off today to complete on a draft which was written a week back. And the draft was the first para of this post. I rarely compose drafts. Either I go full on and finish it off in one shot - the post - or drag it like I had been doing for a month now.


Every time I come across a new incident or an amusing thought I quickly think of my beloved blog and want to tweet on it. A tweet is small message that you can shit on Twitter. You should be ashamed if you don't have an account in Twitter or Facebook by now. If you don't then come join me in having a stubborn nature to register on the plethora of networking sites that are cropping up everyday.

Once famed Orkut is now being used by 10th class kids at a rapid pace and it has lost its charm. When I first joined it in 2006, I felt it was one of its kind. Now you can see all sorts of videos and beautiful bitches advertising on it for a lie down. They are real and if you are on those guys despearte for it, then you should try this place, as they can give you phone numbers as well upon repeated requests. You have to do the authentication part using your wit though.


Talking about Orkut, you cannot get away without reading others testimonials. One sample testimonial for a pretty average looking girl can look like this.

"Pooja is a very lively and bubbly girl. She has got beauty with brains which is one rare combination. She is very intelligent and hardworking and she was always there for me whenever I needed her. She is very kind at heart and is the best girl that I've ever met (Ain't you kidding?). The time I spent was amazing and just did not realise how quickly the time flew by. She has got alround skills and excels in everything she does. Makes friends easily. Sensitive at heart but when she is aggressive guys stay away from her.

Actually this space is not enough to describe her in words(then why are you doing it?). I am very very lucky to have a friend like her(Din't you think of doing something else had she given you a chance?). She is chooo chweet in the way she talks, walks and jokes and guys should be doing pooja to get this lovely Pooja in their life(thanks but no thanks, no donut for you). Love ya dear".

What sort of pathetic testimonial is that? Guys who wrote like this should be out of their brains . Hidden lines:

"Had you agreed, I would have loved you and I could have made you my wife. Even if you din't feel like sharing your life with me, you could have atleast allowed me to do the tiffins and made me happy. I know you don't care now, but I am still sticking my tongue out like a dog hoping that you would shower your mercy on me. I know now that you are enjoying with an other man now by pretending close to me in my college days and I am jealous of it. I am now regretting now as to how I left a pretty woman go alone doing nothing. Give me one chance and I shall make those good old days count to get a feeling that I've achieved something in life."

Got sick of reading those testimonials on girls profiles. They feel so proud of the received testimonials and they will never realize that is bull crap. And what do girls write in the "About Me " section in their profile? "I am simple and straight forward girl. Rest you can know from my testimonials. Strangers, stay away. I will not add you".

Yeah, I am relieved now.


Things that has to move are moving, but slowly. It is difficult to find people matching your speed. The wavelength should match. Considering the speed to be constant, wavelength and frequency are always inversely proportional. Hence you can never obtain a correct match provided if you fix one of the other parameters. If you are able to make only parameter vary then you are able to control your partner and you can possibly be male-dominant in the relationship. If you allow both the parameters to vary, then as Jack warned, "The man is always the slave of his woman's moods. Every man on earth has endured it; so shall you!".


Feeling relaxed that I scribbled something here. Hopefully this should put me back into the nick of things. Till then, keep doing what you are doing and stop sulking in your miserable life.

Unforced Errors:

1. The short dark man and the IPL former commissioner Lalit Modi has weathered the storm. Looks like all Tv channels have taken an oath to not publish any more of the IPL news.
2. The root cause of all this helluva is ......... one woman, who is a friend of External Affairs minister. Proves again that woman are responsible for creation and destruction.
3. The conclusion is, you have your stellar years for only few years.
4. Rafa has finally won back to back Master's titles after almost an year.
5. T20 World Cup is going on in West Indies and the same IPL commentators who were gushing their voices out, suddenly appear dumb while doing the world cup commentary.
6. Former English cricket players still cannot get to grips with T20 format.
7. If you are smart enough to have an extra-marital affair, just assume that your spouse is also having one.
8. Every time I think of buying a Nikon DSLR camera, I check the price and back off.
9. Summers are generally hot ?
10. A search result which made me chuckle was, "Tomcat Hello World for complete fools".

woMan's day

March 8th was forced by some freak to be celebrated as woman's day. It also is the birthday of one of my cousin sister's and so that is why I am reminded of it subconsciously even if I have a habit of forgetting friends birthdays. She has every reason to be proud of celebrating this on her day.

Apart from that, there is nothing special on this day. No not even woman feel great on this day because no one most men will not wish them. The only wishes they get are from the print and electronic media which are paid wishes. In the meanwhile I get a junk sms asking me to buy homes which costs 2250 per sq.ft. They don't know that I don't even have a bike.

Should be great to see chicks freaking out on this day hanging in restaurants and bars sipping orange juice or probably a cock tail. We are not talking about call center girls here. They drink blood out of a man. So what the activity will be like for a freshly graduated girl who is in her first-second years of her working life.


Chick A: Hey, why don't we hang out somewhere today?
Chick B: Yes, sure we can! But what special?
Chick A: Today is women's day yaar. You don't know?
Chick B: Oh really?! Yes, I heard it in FM radio.
Chick A: So where shall we go? ( she does not know where to go but she somehow wants to hang out today)
Chick B: You plan na. I am ready to come anywhere. Who all are coming?
Chick A: Yes, we can call Tina, Meena, Tana, Rana (they have nicknames which are sometimes male), Mona and all.
Chick B: Mona? ( na .. na..) Why her? ( see that chick jealousy today as well)
Chick A: Ok, we can leave her. I will call others and see what they are upto.

Chick A: Hey, howzz u? Why don't we hang out somewhere today?
Chick C: Yes, sure we can! But what special?
Chick A: (Uses some unheard expletives and gets on with the job). Today is.......

Finally a bunch of girls gets ready to hang out and creates the hype in office which no one could even imagine. The news spreads like wild fire and they become the most happening group in the office. "We are going to celebrate women's day at a restaurant", quips to her male team-mate who is constantly trying to woo her. "Congrats yaar, it is really nice of you to celebrate on this day. It is great that they you have a day on your gender. We don't have one", replies that pathetic male.

They go home and dresses to kill (whom? another woman?). You should look at the way they would sashay in the mall. Some unfortunate intelligent girl in the batch reserves a table. They would go there and talk bullcrap which is like candyfloss. Their words are so much that they contain no meaning.

Of the five chicks who are there at the table, two will be very close and would be talking to each other, one would be seriously sms'ing her boy friend (if he is not available, then she would sms to customer care with double the seriousness) and the other two don't like each other so they don't talk . Somehow one girl on whom everyone is jealous of sneaked into the party despite the initial plans to discard her.

They thought of spending the whole night till 9 p.m coz after 9 their PG gates will be closed. Next day in office: "Wow, we had a blast of a time" to that miserable male colleague who is all ears to know what they did yesterday.

Tv channels will be airing special programs, will be conducting contests and giving gifts, malls will give free movie tickets to women, special discounts on ladies products, pink rags are seen everywhere today and a poor lady will be shrieking her voice out in the FM radio all day to encourage her gender.


Everything subsides when they are married even more so for a man. The word woman contains a man. Important terminology related to women, starts with m..e..n.. Their celebrations are never complete without a man.

There is a reason why they do not have a man's day. Or even if there is one they've never created the publicity for they know what the outcome would be like from the ego bloated gender. Probably someone has created a woman's day realizing that the remaining 364 days in a year belong to a man.

Women would even celebrate more on Man's day than their day. The very thought of a Man's day brings smile on to the face of every man and the celebrations are all genuine. Men would really show to the fairer sex on what is the real meaning of "Wow, we had a blast !".

Febulous ?

I was wondering what was the thing that was forcing pathetic visitors to flood this blog. It is my images which are uploaded with proper description of tags. Another visit to my super hit post, Jim Corbett National Park trip, and I shall be selling it to Google to make a fortune. Joke for most of you Manufacturing Defected pieces. Most of the keywords (for ex: 'I want to know about Jim Corbett Park', 'entry charges to Jim Corbett', 'Safari ride in Jim Corbett') that are used to search for information about the Park is resulting in Google search throwing my post in the first page and at times in the first few links. Wow, isn't it?

Turning out to be a pig like lazy creature when it comes to uploading pics for this stupid blog. Thinking of uploading the same from my home but time constraint, you see. Also I do not have cable to transfer pics straight from my mobile to this office computer.

In my last office break, which was in the last week of Jan, I had been to many pilgrim places to attain moksha at such a young age. Covered many of the important pilgrim centers in India, thanks to my mom especially, who is a devoted religious woman. Me? Not like her but the essence of genes will be filtering for generations.

Getting pissed off oflate with my hairstyle which is not changing much after every hair cut. I am not liking my hair style. I am not finding it good.

"Lesser interest on yourself at the salon shop for whatever freaking thing you went there, means, you are getting older".

There is no clear indication than that. It means either you are loaded with responsibilities wherein you do not have time to bother about your looks or you din't do it last night. Time to change the stylist I guess. They don't say for nothing that you are only as good as your last hair cut. Just like that I used that phrase.

I've seen that much hyped movie 'My name is Khan' on the Friday it got released. You'd be more interested to watch golf for three hours than this dull Karan Johar's flick, where the lead protagonist played by shashasha Shah Rukh Khan reiterates, My name is Khan and I am not a terrorist. So, you are a Bollywood baadshah? Reviews said, some scenes put audience to tears. Why? Probably yes, for the gruelling execution of scenes where no character suited the role properly. Watch 'Ishqiya' and you will come out thinking ok fine from the theatre.

Apart from that, it has been this way on every Feb 14th........



...but surprisingly for once it has been like this on this 14th breaking the monotony.


Unforced Errors:

1. Days which you think will not come for you one day, will eventually arrive even though they are delayed.
2. If they've come and gone, then take Alan Wood's medicine. Blame someone else and get on with life.
3. India's test match win at Eden Gardens is being delayed first due to rain and now due to Dabur Amla's ton.
4. Ladies brains are more complex than their bodies. If you say something straight they won't listen. Don't know whether it is due to their bird brains or their inborn stupidity or stubbornness.
5. He..he..he..yet another male chauvinistic comment, yes.
6. Winter we felt was over early this year but it is chilly in the morning and in the evenings. Forecast by our meteorological department is as predictable as our cricketers.
7. SBI PO's recruitment test notification was released and being in a software industry you would always feel Government jobs are better but for the salary.
8. You would never want to blog from your home wasting your precious time.
9.
10. When you are in love, you don't see anything like point no.9, even though I typed something there.
11. Assumptions is the mother of all screw ups.
12. My best title of all my posts so far has just been coined.
13. Unforced errors should not always end in multiples of 5.

Jan news in Feb

I sometimes take pride in writing these posts in the sense, I had been able to maintain this blog for three years with a month's break only once. That is some achievement and I can only compliment myself and sympathise with pathetic visitors who have been hanging on this site since day one they have got this link. The template should be changed which I had been contemplating ever since I created this and it has been three years. But who has time? Even I started pretending that I haven't got time like you freaks.


I also feel I have got a style where I don't drill the point home digging nails one after the other into your bird brain. Takes someone with the opposite of bats to talk the way I had been talking with my limited knowledge and English. Sure, you can hang on other sites who scribble much better than what I do here, but because you are bored and nosey and want to know what's happening to this miserable freak who blogs three posts a month on an average, you've got no other option but to bear the repeated torture day in and day out.


When things go well you do not believe in horoscopes. When they go from bad to worse, you would get underpants wet and run for cover while con. Hence innocent Rock poses the question of the day, "How correct is to believe in horoscopes and proceed for marriages?". Till few days back I too had unwavering faith in this horoscope atleast for marriage. But today, I have relaxed a little on that front. Reason? I am getting younger. From parents front, no let off.

Another point if you folks haven't encountered any two contradicting statements from two astrologers. Each one will stick to his stand and states the other guy is wrong, just like two lawyers fighting in a court room with your father being the judge. Bang your head to the wall if you like the girl and your parents are adamant on the horoscope matching front.


What if an Indian guy marries a ethnic caucasian chic? What about horoscopes then? You do not know what is an exalted planet? I do not want to spoil your weekend.

How big are these traditions actually? I had a headbath today because it is Radhasaptami, birthday of Sun. Actually these traditions are big and we will be called wise if we shut up and follow them unless they put you under real trouble. There is a loophole and work around for everything. A hole accidentally happens to a helmet too.

Heading home for a week's break coz of no work here. It is my grandmothers one year death ceremony and we are supposed to perform these traditions for the Queen maker who studied only 5th standard but had a brain of a collector. You don't get these good habits overnight, they are inherited from your parents, grandparents and extra marital affairs.

Every time I travel in train either I get cold in the middle of the journey or I board the train with cold. This time, it is the latter. Time for early lunch coz I skipped breakfast today which is another dirty habit.

Unforced Errors:

1. One renowned tech-support MNC has break times counted in minutes. If you take a minute extra then you are spanked by the Manager.
2. If you put your head down and work, either you will be unnoticed totally and you would be perceived as a good attitude guy so you do not have any problem in the office or somebody else is going to play politics on you sooner than later.
3. Australian Open is underway and Rafa is looking threatening. Safina is probably competing with Rafa in the muscles department.
4. Once friends Google and Apple, are turning foes. Apple is even considering joining hands with its arch-rival Macrohard.
5. I've seen the second half of Shawshank Redemption so many times I am getting bored of this super hit movie.
6. US is called super power for nothing. It is one of those countries which is deploying massive aid and ground forces to Haiti vicitms where over 200,000 are believed to be dead.
7. When in cold, I feel more hungry.
8. You should have read this post as if it was posted 22nd Jan. Now I am back to where I am and I am alive and kicking and sucking and cribbing.
9. I could not post it on that date because there was an error in the posts. Hence the delay of 10 days. I have a freak as mate who has seven unfinished posts till date. I'm better that way.
10. What is a post without a dig on girls.

"Men would fall easily for girls who cry than girls falling for crying men."

or not for the end result has to be seen.

The Single Tea

The previous decade was not over in a flash but it took 10 years. Imagine you being in your chaddi days at the beginning of the decade and imagine now. Some change over the course of 10 years and some change over a span of 1 year staying abroad and some others will never change even if they roam the entire world.

I haven't taken any new year resolutions and I guess you haven't made the biggest idiotic mistake you could ever make at the start of a new year. Think where you yourself would like to see 10 years down the lane from now. The last time some one asked me where would you see yourself five down the lane, five years back, I've answered, I like to be in a good position in a good company, well settled, get married, possibly have a kid and thank god I ended blabbering there.

Here I am now after five freaking years that sped just like that with the current status-______-symbolically expressed in a picture.

The Single tea

If one likes to see what's making news, it is the Google Nexus phone, where web meets the phone bullshit with underlying Android platform. Cheap phone compared to orange's iphone with enhanced voice recognition features. Too early too call if it is the new in phone in the market, but it definitely should eat Apple's super hit phone's revenues by a good chunk. The adwords on which G followed by 100 zeros company generates 70% of its revenues, is making way into the mobile segment as well. This time that fruit company is not lagging behind and does not want to see this hi tech tech-geek company to be the adword leader in mobile segment as well. That is why they had acquired some mobile adword company and the war rages on.

Amidst all these, newly married Jack on mail, said,

"Girls are strong, though! If they love someone, they are gonna do it with all heart and if they hate someone, they do with all might. And if they decide to forget someone, it's a snap with a little finger".

Many of my friends had been at the receving end of the stick from girls including yours truly. So innocent Rock had his own point concurring to Jack saying,

"Men can neither dump girls nor can accept getting dumped that easily".

The debate goes on and the weaker gender (the ladies who cry even when they see a mosquito) should be boiling underneath to hang on to this male chavunistic site experiencing repeated abusing and emotional torturing.

I hope this decade will not be like what you had in the previous decade. I am not stupid enough to wish this decade should be bright, colourful, troublefree, three times a week shots or you should hit gold in every stock option you invest. I only wish it should make you a better person and me the best.

Unforced Errors:

1. Thought of elaborating on single tea but I defer the hammering.
2. Some guy used a deodorant so heavily and it was so pungent that I could smell that even with a sneezy nose.
3. The once attitude boy Virat Kohli accepted that he had toned down his behaviour which is why he is in rich vein of form in the ongoing triangular tournament.
4. Every time I take a picture, I quickly think of putting it in my blog, but I don't.
5. Fog here was so bad that the visibility was reduced to less than 100 metres at 8am couple of days back.
6. Casanova guy was happy last time that I haven't directed any UE's to him.
7. It gives one a sense of momentary achievement whenever they see their writing posted on their own stupid site.

For one story that is brewing in here which is caught in the mire of technology and tradition, one probable conclusion could be somebody's gonna get hurt real bad.

Last blog of the decade

Scribbling something in time before we leave for home early to make this as my last post of this decade. To repeat the same feat by the end of the next decade, one should be alive, kicking and importantly should have the zeal like I do have now to blabber relentlessly eating your brain with tea spoons on every little occasion.

This god damn running nose is trying to spoil my new year imaginary plans and never it had been this way in the past oh - so how many years. Eyes have gone red and they have swollen a bit due to strain or perhaps due to no drain of cold fluids from the system yet.


Probable reason for my eccentric barking is to let out the steam that has been building inside and also waiting for the clock to tick over 4pm. So I can put my wallet in the pocket and run from here as I did when I was in my engineering days to catch the first bus after the end of the day. Folks would like to gather spend time with their mates but if you are one freaking solo fighter all you have got is zero social network and -1 moral science theory.

As I promised in my last blog, Avatar 2D was not great. Had the movie been made with humans it would had been a dud with the same story line. A 3D version of it would enable you to appreciate the magnanimity involved in the making of it. Visual effects could be exemplary. But with a 2D, if you are physically strained on that particular movie watching day, before you understand what the movie is all about the first would be over and you would, like me, sleep at the climax in the second half.

Day before New Year should be exciting. Back in those days, the single tea's used to spend time at home watching all the Tv programs till 12 mid night and cut a cake probably and go to bed immediately. If your Dad is a Govt employee in a decent rank, you would receive tasteless apples which you would hate to eat. Now you are thinking twice to buy the same apples at exorbitant rates. If you get something for free, chances are you would go easy on that. There is a thrill in saying things which you freaks already know.

As you grow older, you end up asking people, "What are your plans tonight?", to which no particular freak has a definite answer. That is because as time grows by you become matured, your instincts die, you become professional, you lose friends, you cannot spend money and most importantly you don't have the excitement on a 31st night.


It is a great feeling taking into account the entire world in your favour by unleashing one's unscrupulous thoughts spoiling their mood just in time so you can go out and celebrate unashamedly.

Happy New Year !

Xmas weekend in Mumbai

So that's how you get used to things. You wait for something or someone for a period of time and you don't get to see the result in your favour, you are bound to get rid of it from your system slowly. In this case my posts, in some other cases your poignant memories. Haven't one heard of, "Time heals everything"?.

Mumbai Marine drive

The Christmas weekend was in Mumbai. My first outing in the commercial capital after 8 years. The only difference between the previous two times was during my first visit with my parents I was in my diapers still and in this visit I am all out with my friends. That is precisely why I had a chance to relax on the Marine drive till 2 am.

Not your head, but sky taken from the drive

Mumbai is quite relaxed and one can leisurely walk on the streets even in the midnight. In Delhi, you have to be in your house by 6pm in the evening especially in the winters. Ok, make it 10 pm. Travelling is hectic in Mumbai because of excessive vehicles on the streets. The architecture which is more of old fashioned type gives a feeling of the British rule in India. Guys who are already there working in the city can probably find it boring. You like something because you don't have it. And once you have it you do not realise the value of it.

Leopold cafe

Sitting in Leopold cafe, which was one of the prime targets for Mumbai attacks last year made me feel uncomfortable. I was looking around the cafe to identify any bullet driven holes, but the cafe was so crowded that you should be lucky to get a seat. Do not know why it is such a hang out place for foreigners out there, but it surely must have got some history attached to it. Felt good to sit in that place but also felt uneasy looking at both entrances into the cafe imagining the terrorists loaded with guns on that fatal day. You are in a helpless situation when nut heads barge into the cafe' with automatic weapons that have a capacity to fire hundreds of rounds in just a minute.

We headed to that cafe because we were told, "Staa..aaags are not allowed" by the usherer at Red Light disco at 11 pm on Saturday night. Thinking that was not the first time I received egg on my face, I dropped my plans for listening to music on that night immediately. My friend tried to use his influence by calling other friend, who claimed that he went upstairs an hour before in his 3/4ths but to no avail.

View from Pizzera at Marine drive

Before heading to Colaba, we saw 3 Idiots - the movie was rated as the best movie of the decade by Economic Times. The movie is once watchable and the climax scene was over dramatic and hence I say the movie has lost its charm for what is originally meant for. The title did not suit aptly either for the lead characters haven't done anything remotely stupid to justify the title. All three folks in the movie are career oriented, unlike me.

Mumbai Skyline

Just before we set off for the movie, my mate gave his engagement party to us. That was a good sumptuous vegetarain meal for just Rs.300 at Barbecue Nation in Thane. It is unlimited. You also get to eat pig like chance on the deserts as well.

Unforced Errors:

1. Babes near the disco are just as good as you get to see desi babes in US of A. The notion in public is young folk in India are more style oriented than their desi counter parts in the States.
2. Travelling in winter and with very little sleep will lead to a running nose.
3. Google has started its new year count down which I only saw today and someone reduce the font and colour size for crying out loud.
4. Somehow I became a critic of movies and it takes a lot to impress me in movies. Forthcoming blabber on Avatar.
5. I was wearing vest, t-shirt, long sleeve t-shirt and jerkin when I started from here and I could just roam in a t-shirt in Mumbai in the midnight.
6. My desperation for chicks is coming down. That does not mean I am going to the other end of the gender.
7. I have a feeling that you get connected to whatever I dish because you folks are not stupid enough to fall for cheap freaks who talk all the time extra sweet. Ladies would fall ofcourse.
8. I am showing off my Mumbai trip details here coz I had been to a big city.

All izzz well.