Pathetic blog awards

So what's prompting me to post another one in so quick time after posting one last month itself. The list of tags, awards, ladies blogs, best blogger, sweet blogger, protected by Copyscape posters when I see on toddlers blogs is what is forcing me to come out of hibernation. All that they have a name beneath that poster who had given it to them. The 'no limit to mentalness' ends with a :) Why daddy?


Ok it looks cute on the blog with all those posters gifted by your pathetic mates for free. Read the comments and you will quickly come to a conclusion that all those commenters are in close relationship to the author.


Contrast that to this stupid blog which is never updated on the side bar. The last time it was updated was 3 years ago when it was first created. This sends a straight message to Lord Brahma. I am the creator but I am not responsible for their existence or their growth. But Brahma does take care of the beings existence and his fate. The final act will be performed by Shiva, the destroyer. Last known destroyer to me was Virender Sehwag.


Do you?.......... Me neither.

Seriously (stress and drag the pronunciation as much as you can to give a ringing effect to your next person).... who is bothered with all those pathetic awards which were awarded to by your friend-like bloggers? Will that give you a chance to compete with the best blogger of the country award? Are you getting monetary gains from it? Or you want to show off how cool you are only on the blog? Better display Google Ads and you can get some .00001 cents for every click clicked by a dumb jerk. I see that is a way of decoration? Please meet me in person.

Robo. One truly Indian movie which truly has Hollywood style taking and in the second half. It is worth seeing it on screen than downloading it. The fact that the director and producer attempted such a grandiose movie and pulled it off well deserves applause.

Process. Why are processes made so complicated in a company? Processes are infact made to make the job easier but, hell no. They are a pain in your rear.

Quit. Why don't I quit rather than dragging things in here and in my company? I am doing it precisely now.

Unforced Errors:

1. 15 unforced errors were made by Federer against Stepanek in Paris Masters.

The Change

1. I got married.
2. I am moving from here.
3. Read the first.

Finally the much awaited change has taken place to shake the tectonic plates lying underneath me. Though one change cannot be better than the other in any form but one sure can say the second has happened because of the first. "Marriage will definitely bring new changes in your life" echoed my best mate and I believed it when he said it.


I used to feel the same too but never did I believe in it that much as when he said it. Whether the change is good or bad depends on how we mould it?

This stupid space which has been dried up for ages has come alive before this Diwali with torch lights flooding the center of the page. How long the light flashes on it is anybody's guess. But today is a gift that is why it is called present.

Putting down the papers and still coming to the office to serve the notice period is one of the toughest things. Your existence ceases the moment you lay down the papers. Not as though I was existing before but the confirmation arrives in some form after laying down. Every hour you spend is a nightmare with every half hour accounting to a daymare.

Struggling to put 2 and 2 on the key board for I lost the habit of my writing and the absence of my dumb wit is not helping the matters. There still is one thing lingering in my mind despite the change. Have to do something about it.

I scroll up and down to see how paras I have done so I can wind up, but it was only three short paragraphs. Hence I blabber on.

One feels relieved when he puts his papers. So will be the child when you changes his diapers. Ain't you afraid to burn the crackers?

Probably my worst post. But it still is better than yours.

The unreal reality shows

I thought Re.1 Vicks will not control my cold. But after lunch I think the cold was controlled to some extent. Don't know if it is the Vicks effect or the fresh air effect outside. Thought of running and taking the bus like in a Nivaran cough syrup ad, but knowing our pathetic conditioned buses I returned to four half walls.

So Question Time. Do you think Reality shows are real? If the answer is Yes, Type QT Yes and SMS it to 57237. At the beginning of our show, the answer is 63%. Your telephone subscriber will punch a 6 rupee hole through your pocket.


You think your favourite Roadies, Splitsvilla and those bunch of singing shows going in various channels are real? Roadies still has a lot of fans. Leave aside Slutsvilla . What sort of pathetic freak do you have to be to believe those reality shows are real. They are called reality shows for a reason. Whatever they do on the screen is nothing but a tad short of Oscar level acting.

They cry, they laugh, they over act, they show extra ordinary emotions, they tell their sad stories..what not.. all this to make you glued to that show. The shows call in celebrities for competitions. Those celebrities are already aware of the answers or else how do you expect those dumb girls to be answering tough questions?

There are no more good Tv shows. Whatever show that you are watching is commercialized to the maximum possible extent. It is better to watch Saas bahu serials than watching those reality shows. Roadies, what a bluff. And it has all young educated guys following it. I really go nuts when someone asks me, do you know who is the latest Roadie? You know this year's Roadie is going abroad. Roadie my foot. MTv which was once used to be a good music channel can no longer survive on songs and interviews and hence is coming up with such programs.

Splitsvilla show went a step ahead and it promptly received an order by the Govt of India to stop airing it. Are they trying to entertain or they trying to spoil the young folks with lap and belly dances to woo their male partners in the show. What kind of sick idea it is to prove your loyalty about your partner to someone else? They do it coz they are getting paid for it. Why do you and I have to get excited to what happens to whichever girl he goes with?


Just take that reality shows are fake. Learn how these reality shows fake it. Even those news readers and Live reporters too do not convey the content as it is meant to be. These shows are no different than your favorite childhood show, WWF. If you want to see some sedate news then watch DD English news. You will be at peace. It still is decent when it comes to the news readers not trying for Oscars. They don't make your hair stiff by asking you to stay on that channel.

Those sad stories that they show you are exclusively shot with proper props to make you empathize with the guy or girl there. No doubt it is true. But the news reporter putting such a remorse expression to gain your attention is totally not acceptable.


So what do I have to watch on the idiot box? Watch sports. They are cleaner and have some emotion and planning to the way they play. They are not tainted badly till date. Though it is very easily possible to fake sports, the concept of reality sports hasn't really taken off. Till then enjoy whether you are follow ring, kabaddi or baseball.

Bottomline: What you see on the Tv is not true. Watch judiciously and don't get so freaking attached to any freaking program.

By the way, the number of people saying 'Yes' to the poll has risen to 95% at the end of the show.

Time's flying

Not so. That is why I am blogging. It surely is flying for the D day but not so much in the four walled cubicle that I am sitting in. A feeling of regret is creeping because I am doing nothing exciting before I embark on the donkey's ride. Worse, I am eating Maggi every alternate night to compensate for my lazy cooking inactivity. To every log that reads "Enjoy your last few Bachelor days", is added by people, the more the back bends and the mind goes berserk.


I remember wishing people the same and no one evoked much response when they were heading for their marriage. I got excited that they should be doing something special for those last few days, but no, I don't think many folk had much fun. Putting myself in those shoes now, I am hardly running to keep myself fit. People normally work hard on their body and looks so that they could look better in shape for the day which is a couple of months away.


They do gymming and Himalayan trekking to send their belly as much as inside so that they feel confident, looking in the mirror and infront of the public at the reception. Face packs, facials and bleaching which were once designated for ladies are becoming a rage in Men's saloon parlours. I know couple of friends who reduced atleast 5 kilos to look young. One mate started running to reduce the belly and body fat.

Me doing nothing. I am scratching my head. I was better looking for my brothers engagement but as the day is approaching there is a sick look that is coming on my face. There is no motivation to eat , cook, sleep and work out. I haven't even done my shopping. All these things put together make up a question, why am I not kick-ass excited? I probably realize that the things that are heading later after the official bell may not be that rosy afterall.


Proof? Look at that pathetic freak in your office or your neighbour who got married recently. There is one lingering thought that has been rummaging my mind to which there are no openings. The bloke sitting next to me says, "the count down has begun". Yeah, at a rapid pace, the time is flying.

Unforced Errors:

1. After that BP oil spill, it is the turn of Mumbai oil spill and you have no inkling where you are heading to.
2. Ok, take this. An ice berg which is 4 times the size of Manhattan was broken in Arctic and is travelling at some pace. It might take an year before it hits the oil rigs and ships. If it melts, water level in the oceans can rise upto 6 metres with your pants dropping by half a metre.
3. My fiance' said she is like coconut. Hard outside and soft inside. I laughed.
4. New recruits from colleges are good this time. They are smarter than me because they know where they are heading to.
5. If you know the destination, the journey to that spot will take its on course. Do a Google patent search before you claim this line.
6. If you DO NOT Know the destination, where you and I fall in, then wait for the unforgettable kick on the fear. Free to use this one.
7. You should see 'Once upon a time in Mumbai' just for Ajay Devgan's commanding presence as a gangster on the screen.
8. Every time Laxman scores a fifty or above in a Test match, it looks Very Very Special.
9. Why is Roger's cup called a Roger's cup? Roger is not going to win it anymore. He is world number three for the first time since 2003....he..he..heee.
10. Seems like I never learn from stock markets. Thank your heavens if you haven't invested in it. It is not for the weak and the meek.
11. Ever wondered why August 4th was important? No, you don't.

Vi ses!

Chandni Chowk in Delhi

We had to go to Chandni Chowk to see if there are any dresses available for ladies. We means I and woh. We got down at the Metro station and the much famed Chowk is not visible outright. You had to pass through all sorts of vendors lined outside the Metro resembling true India. It was a long walk to the main road as compared to other Metro stations. While the Metro is Delhi's best and world class way of commuting around the city, few mass areas like Chandni Chowk and the subsequent stations nearby have to be revamped.

It was quite chaotic as expected as we approached the road where there are lots of shops lined up for sarees, suits and sherwanis. After doing googling on that area, I have narrowed down two streets which I thought should be visited. Katra Ashrafi is the street where you would be finding wholesale shops for embroidery items for ladies. We went to Chhabra 555, the famed store for ladies in the NCR. After being treated with a glass of water at the store and spending half-an-hour seeing the collection, we decided it was not worth it. It was supposed to be the HQ for the Chhabra group and yet it could not satisfy its customers. The stores that are present in the city may have better variety.

We went into one of the last stores in that street and she finally bought one decent suit which was on sale for Rs 525. It was worth the price. As it was getting late, we thought it would be a good idea to eat some parathas in the 'Parathewali galli'. I was expecting a feast of parathas makers lined in the street. It defies the logic and there were only two visible paratha shops doubting the quality. But because it was a famous street my fears were allayed and was waiting for the ordered mutter parathas to be served.

I was first not happy with the size of the paratha and second, the price starting from Rs 30. It was roughly the size of a puri and then the paratha was fried in oil. Just as they claim the store to be established in 1875, so could be the oil in which they were frying the parathas. I immediately felt, the parathas outside my office are way better than the ones we had there for half the price.

She said, I am never going to go that place to shop again. We did not have time to visit the other streets for a whole variety of other wholesale goods. Had there been no Metro, it would have become draining to commute to these remote locations. The local buses in Delhi are pathetic to say the least. It is now that the government authorities are plying new buses on the roads and slowly phasing out the old ones in view of the Common Wealth games. Thanks to Delhi Metro for making the commutation smooth and convenient for the public in the Capital city.

And how do you know that the Metro is good? Look at the crowd in the metro trains in the peak hours. As with everything, the trains used to be neat once but now there are being spoiled with all sorts of advertisements.

The Chandni Chowk in Delhi which boasts its roots from the Mughal empire is overhyped today. You don't find the stuff you want to buy any cheaper there. The chowk is banking on its reputation and people are slowly shifting to other commercial areas for shopping. I feel it is no more the place for everything that you want you will get there area at your affordable price. In a nut shell, Chandni Chowk does not live up to atleast half your expectations. Deenekka...deenikanna vizag poorna market better.

Ladies blogs

Just cannot help myself giggling seeing ladies blogs. They really put a lot of emotion in their blogs as if it is their life. Somewhere from their brain they will bring out the unexisting design qualities and show their stupid creativity in their blog. Should someone comment or criticize on it expect a hot pan thrown on your face. And what will be the content like on the pink background?

1. My favoritttttte chocolate
2. Top 5 things I luv da most
3. My dream man.........
4. Chikoos b'day....chooo chweettt (Gun down that girl who coined chooo. Do they know that Cho is a Korean name?)
5. Cake cutting in mah office (Expect lot of comments here from all male pigs)
6. Household ribbons and my passions
7. Here is Rena's awesome recipe for vanilla cake
8. A movie review
9. Lonely feeling....without expressing (Is that a rhyme?)
10. I miss you (Yeah, you deserve it for being so pathetic when he was around)

That's it. The blog ends then and there. They have lost words. They become more pathetic after scribbling for few days. Infact, they started all this because her wiser friend had advised her to start a blog.


You don't find any keywords like sports, tennis, internet, coding(what a crime), computer, news, cars, bikes, hollywood, affaris, scandals etc in their blog. They are stupid enough to watch all those stupid serials and glad I haven't found one blog which is focussing on how sorrowful a character is in a particular serial. Splitsvilla is a peppy youth show which they watch when her parents are not around. Someone will surely be having the brains though to come up with a blog with the latest happenings on the most followed serials on Indian Television. You cannot stop aunties then.

So that is why ladies are portrayed as dumb and a man expresses shock when he comes across an intelligent, shrewd woman. Ladies cannot complete their course work in school and college without depending for notes from their male friends. Very rarely you find super lady programmers. The sports they play are kho-kho, throwball and ring. The one thing they are best at is to mend their male colleagues to get their job done. That is an innate ability which needs a special mention.

If they are not getting their work done, they will put out the biggest trick up their sleeves. Put a remorse expression or better cry.

With all these special qualities they still want to compete with men in all aspects. Say that a man is intelligent than a woman and you are bound to get a stabbing with a kitchen knife from your , leave alone saying you are great.

What started as a ladies blog turned out into a mosquito egg sized rant which always make your stomach lighter if you had loaded it with a decent lunch. Oh, I almost forgot the awesome one liner which they repeatedly use to mean they are equal to men.

while(1)
{

Don't show me your attitude, coz I have mah own!

}

What The Federer !

WTF. This man scares the opponents even before taking the court with his invincibility. And once he takes the court and is locked in a battle, he scares the players with his presence. How many times had he disintegrated the players mentally and went on to win the match when he was staring down the barrel?

Thank god atleast once he acknowledged that he was lucky to get through this match. And it was not a straight Roddick like statement. It had its twists. I have been unlucky in few matches this year so I needed a bit of it today.


Did anyone notice he was behaving well at the net in congratulating his opponents after beating them? He thinks that blokes in the dressing room needs his empathy? Ask Roddick. Has he learned a thing or two from Djokovic or Nadal to be courteous to opponents?

Federer was 2 sets down and was facing truck load of break points in the third set and was thinking of a return flight to his hometown. 60th ranked Falla even was serving for the match in the 4th set but the famous choke which has been the case for many a player when leading Federer in a match has returned. Federer sensed it and broke him. John McEnroe said,"Relax and get your drinks", when Federer was leading 6 -1 in the tie breaker in the 4th set. He relaxed and so are the millions of Federer nut heads heaved a collected sigh of relief. Since then it is always one player who is going to wave to the spectators after the match.

This is all achieved by a player who was arrogant, short tempered and had a fragile psyche in his teen days. Winning the first set has been the key to his success for major part of his career. He played as his life and match depended on the first set. After doing that consistently he gained in confidence. Confidence breeds confidence. Roger Federer has morphed into an intimidating figure in the history of mens tennis to his peers who were in awe with his repertoire of skills.

My dream of Federer getting knocked out in the first round of Wimbledon and stun the audience on Centre Court came so close and got shattered. As always, I wait for it to happen. But it would have been sweet as honey had the dream got when it was least expected. Yesterday was one day and has gone begging.

I can only fall back on hope.

Hope is a good thing, probably the best of things and no good thing ever dies.

Tramlines:



Rafael Nadal is a god send. He has the fighting abilities ever since he turned a pro. Nadal may not have the grace, serve or precision like Federer. But he took it to the King very early in his career when Federer was in full flight and handed him the defeat. The Spaniard is not the one to be intimidated. He goes into the psyche of Federer and plays double fisted backhands and high looping forehands in his mind. He knows Federer is very vulnerable even after achieving staggering records. More than that he accepts defeats. That is why he is respected which Federer realised very late in his career.

Peace mate.

Haridwar trip

My parents are here and we went to Haridwar and Rishikesh in the last weekend. We hired a cab and started at 6:30 am on the Saturday morning. The moment we reached Haridwar, it was 3:30 pm. Take 1 hr break for breakfast and 30 mins break for the tyre puncture at 1 pm. The distance is 210 kms and it can be covered in 5 hrs if the road is free.


There are train options as well but this knucklehead decided on Friday evening at 6pm to visit the holy place. The cab was confirmed finally at 11pm. So there is no chance of a train. It is better to enter the train and bend your back to the TTE than trying to book a ticket in IRCTC. Long queues at the stations will force you to buy a shikanji if not a Maaza.

Did not expect such traffic on the roads on that day. These Delhities haven't got any work. Pick a car and head someway to the North or the East during the weekend. I never love driving. Add to that it was an amavasya day and people wanted to take dip in the holy Ganga.


Looks like they have been commiting sins just I have been doing and so the place was totally crowded as it was a Kumbh Mela. The Ganga river flowing at the Hari ki Paudi ghat in Haridwar was good and the water has some speed. If you don't hold to any of the chains, then there is every chance that you may lose your footing and name in the Govt census will be deleted. One can to little deep into the river because it looks as if it was man made ghat for specifically for bathing.


People cannot drown in the river because there is a concrete base under your feet atleast to some extent. So it is common to see people going away from the bank and into the river. I haven't tried testing how far is the concrete base for I was holding tightly to the iron chains at the ghat. If the water flow is little less, it is a very nice place to learn swimming.


I took a bath the same day in the evening at 6 pm and next day again at 7 am. We then went back to the hotel, packed our bags and headed to Rishikesh. It is more sedate and it is not as protected as Haridwar to have a dip in the river at the banks. The water is quite cold even in this summer.


Had misssed seeing couple of important temples (Chandi and Manasa Devi) in Haridwar. There is a ropeway to reach those temples. Altogether a taxing trip in the taxi coz of the unexpected traffic. Should try next time when I go there with a certain someone preferably by train.

Unforced Errors:

1. The Wimbledon draw is out and Rafa has a potential quarter final clash with none other than Robin Soderling.
2. People living in the hill stations are more friendly than the ones living in the cities.
3. Our taxi driver has travelled atleast 40 kms extra when we were out for bathing and I cut down that many kms while calculating the total kms for the bill settlement.
4. Federer is not going to win this year's Wimbledon.
4. Keep your eyes wide open while dipping at the ghat for the obvious reasons.
5. People dip in the holy rivers to get rid of their sins and devils in their systems.

Toque of the day:

Forget about the devil wearing a Prada, it does not even wear a cut draayar.

En-guaged

So I had been footballed from one department to the other in my office. Che Guevara says, "Don't forget the revloution". Me says, "I forgot my independence". Don't even think of connecting the dots to make a complete picture. There is a breaking point for everything.

Finally there is a girl in this world who nodded to exchange the ring with me. This disaster took place on June 5th, 2010. Not a whole lot of hoopla-hypla was present at the event. It was a simple event. So simple was the event that there was no fan for the dignitaries sitting on the small dias. The hall was supposed to be yeh see.

Want more? Ok, she is a computer science B.E graduate looking for a software job. If you see any jobs hanging from the tree just let me know. Don't want to know more now?

During that busy weekend Rock royally screwed up a simple interview. The guys who took my interview did not have my CV and I did not carry one either. Result: C - bad.

It always is comfortable to talk about sports than myself, for you would be knowing that I am more pathetic-er than you. Rafa regained his number 1 ranking and Soderling punched where it hurts Federer the most. You would be knowing what a bad loser Roger Federer was if you looked at the way he shook hands at the net with Soderling in the Quarter Final FO match. Some drill this point to that Federer nut heads all round the world.

A sort of complacency will creep in your miserable lives if you are stuck at one place for long. Complacency later leads to insecurity which finally develops to a blow up incompetitive attitude in you. Love the job but not the company because you never know when the company stops loving you. If this is still not your wake up call then the alarm that goes off tomorrow morning surely should be.

A week after beginning the post I am back here again to continue preaching to my disciples. The
Wimbledon draw does not get updated and I am not following the Radio.

Preparations are going on and the atmosphere is building up. And I non-chalantly say what the fuss is all about. And I have my mates warning me of the impending circumstances. I am already reducing one enjoyment. Few more should be in the pipeline.


Glad that I am not following tennis as I used to coz she is the biggest TV lover I have ever seen. TV is her first love. I fall somewhere in the second. Before getting guaged life used to be beautiful. The doom's day is August 28th and that is when the donkey ride begins with my darling.

Super Soderling stomps Federer on his way to French Open semis

One can take only so much beating. Robin Soderling was defeated 12 times in a row by Roger Federer before making the statement of his life. Soderling was painting lines in his French Open quarter finals to which Federer had no answer whatsoever. He knocked out the World No.1 in four sets with minimal fuss. Few forced screams of come-on's from Federer did not intimidate Soderling who was in top form all through this match.

There was a lot riding on Federer's shoulders heading into this match. His No.1 ranking, his consecutive 23 semi final streak and his total number of weeks at the top as No.1 compared to Pete Sampras'. His No.1 ranking and the total weeks at the top will now depend on Rafael Nadal winning the French Open final on Sunday. If Nadal wins on Sunday, provided if he wins his quarters and the semis, then that could probably signal the end of Federer's stranglehold on the No.1 spot for he has truck load of points to defend going into the second half of the season starting from Wimbledon.


Soderling showed great character to maintain his composure all through the match despite the crowd strongly behind the Swiss master. Everytime Soderling went on to check the ball mark of a service by Federer in the fourth set the crowd began to boo Soderling. The French crowd was rooting Soderling last year when he defeated Nadal in the fourth round but clearly was not the crowd favorite this time when the 16 time Grand Slam champion began his quest to defend his maiden Roland Garros title.

The Swede was dropping 200 kmph services at will and for few Federer was barely able to get the racquet. Even at the baseline slugfest Soderling was clearly over powering Federer which resulted in many forced errors from Federer's racquet. There were no signs of choking while serving for the match from Soderling and he finished the job professionally. He did not celebrate wildly after notching the biggest win of his career. A fist pump and solid stare across the net showed the hidden spunk which he had all along his playing years.

Soderling's coach, Magnus Norman should receive due credit for making Soderling play the way he currently is plus the calm demeanor is yielding good results for the Sweden's player - coach duo.

On a day when Soderling was on song, Federer blinked. When asked about how it was like defeating Nadal in the last year's French Open and Federer at this year's open, Soderling jokingly said, "Yeah, it can't get any better".

Robin Soderling's win today is again an ample evidence of what belief in oneself can do to one's mental make-up. This shows that if one has the burning desire to bring down the top guy in the tour it is absolutely possible even after getting battered and bruised. For Soderling, it has taken 13 attempts to scale the peak. In your and my case all it needs is a dogged determination.

IRCTC woes

It is going ok so far. One post per month and thanks that few pathetic visitors had stopped visiting this site. I am still one those pathetic visitors though.

Whenever you think of a rant, you think of your blog. One such rant today will be on IRCTC. It used to be a good site for train reservations as recently as three months. But since Summer the website has turned pathetic than a passenger train. For now I know three ways to book a train ticket online. 1. IRCTC 2. Makemytrip 3. Cleartrip

Through whichever trip you are booking the ticket, you trip will never be through. Tatkal quota opens at 8am everyday and even if your travel dates are flexible, you would still never get a tatkal ticket two days before your travel despite hanging on the site like a bat from a tree, spoiling your sleep from 8am. IRCTC server never gets connected and you would get your turn after two hours to book a ticket. You will see the cinema that time with the waiting list number hovering around the 80's.

It is a real mess with the site oflate. You are not even able to login at 8am, forget about booking the ticket. If you are one of those lucky blokes who come close to booking a ticket after entering your and the credit card details, then comes your IRCTC's blue screen of death message, "Service Unavailable".


Three freaking days I was hanging on the site at 8am to make a reservation but no, it was impossible.

No one knows who all are the fraudulent people make the life miserable to the common man by not allowing them to book the tickets. But everyone guesses it is the travel agents who are doing it. Call the railway guys and you may probably get a curt answer saying, "Load on the server is high and too many reservations being made. It is a fair process".

We still haven't spoken about the people standing in the serpentine queues at the reservation counters. Enough said.

Dis-May

It has been more than a month since I've updated anything here from my last ladies post. Sort of feeling tetchy if I don't post for a month. And if this trend continues then you can expect that this blog from Rock is heading for the rocks like any other. All this BS explanation happens only when you don't get time or you are occupied with things that are more important than barking here in this empty space.

Work wise it is little ok. Getting a sinking feeling here. Heck when did I ever talk about work in this stupid space. Taking some time off today to complete on a draft which was written a week back. And the draft was the first para of this post. I rarely compose drafts. Either I go full on and finish it off in one shot - the post - or drag it like I had been doing for a month now.


Every time I come across a new incident or an amusing thought I quickly think of my beloved blog and want to tweet on it. A tweet is small message that you can shit on Twitter. You should be ashamed if you don't have an account in Twitter or Facebook by now. If you don't then come join me in having a stubborn nature to register on the plethora of networking sites that are cropping up everyday.

Once famed Orkut is now being used by 10th class kids at a rapid pace and it has lost its charm. When I first joined it in 2006, I felt it was one of its kind. Now you can see all sorts of videos and beautiful bitches advertising on it for a lie down. They are real and if you are on those guys despearte for it, then you should try this place, as they can give you phone numbers as well upon repeated requests. You have to do the authentication part using your wit though.


Talking about Orkut, you cannot get away without reading others testimonials. One sample testimonial for a pretty average looking girl can look like this.

"Pooja is a very lively and bubbly girl. She has got beauty with brains which is one rare combination. She is very intelligent and hardworking and she was always there for me whenever I needed her. She is very kind at heart and is the best girl that I've ever met (Ain't you kidding?). The time I spent was amazing and just did not realise how quickly the time flew by. She has got alround skills and excels in everything she does. Makes friends easily. Sensitive at heart but when she is aggressive guys stay away from her.

Actually this space is not enough to describe her in words(then why are you doing it?). I am very very lucky to have a friend like her(Din't you think of doing something else had she given you a chance?). She is chooo chweet in the way she talks, walks and jokes and guys should be doing pooja to get this lovely Pooja in their life(thanks but no thanks, no donut for you). Love ya dear".

What sort of pathetic testimonial is that? Guys who wrote like this should be out of their brains . Hidden lines:

"Had you agreed, I would have loved you and I could have made you my wife. Even if you din't feel like sharing your life with me, you could have atleast allowed me to do the tiffins and made me happy. I know you don't care now, but I am still sticking my tongue out like a dog hoping that you would shower your mercy on me. I know now that you are enjoying with an other man now by pretending close to me in my college days and I am jealous of it. I am now regretting now as to how I left a pretty woman go alone doing nothing. Give me one chance and I shall make those good old days count to get a feeling that I've achieved something in life."

Got sick of reading those testimonials on girls profiles. They feel so proud of the received testimonials and they will never realize that is bull crap. And what do girls write in the "About Me " section in their profile? "I am simple and straight forward girl. Rest you can know from my testimonials. Strangers, stay away. I will not add you".

Yeah, I am relieved now.


Things that has to move are moving, but slowly. It is difficult to find people matching your speed. The wavelength should match. Considering the speed to be constant, wavelength and frequency are always inversely proportional. Hence you can never obtain a correct match provided if you fix one of the other parameters. If you are able to make only parameter vary then you are able to control your partner and you can possibly be male-dominant in the relationship. If you allow both the parameters to vary, then as Jack warned, "The man is always the slave of his woman's moods. Every man on earth has endured it; so shall you!".


Feeling relaxed that I scribbled something here. Hopefully this should put me back into the nick of things. Till then, keep doing what you are doing and stop sulking in your miserable life.

Unforced Errors:

1. The short dark man and the IPL former commissioner Lalit Modi has weathered the storm. Looks like all Tv channels have taken an oath to not publish any more of the IPL news.
2. The root cause of all this helluva is ......... one woman, who is a friend of External Affairs minister. Proves again that woman are responsible for creation and destruction.
3. The conclusion is, you have your stellar years for only few years.
4. Rafa has finally won back to back Master's titles after almost an year.
5. T20 World Cup is going on in West Indies and the same IPL commentators who were gushing their voices out, suddenly appear dumb while doing the world cup commentary.
6. Former English cricket players still cannot get to grips with T20 format.
7. If you are smart enough to have an extra-marital affair, just assume that your spouse is also having one.
8. Every time I think of buying a Nikon DSLR camera, I check the price and back off.
9. Summers are generally hot ?
10. A search result which made me chuckle was, "Tomcat Hello World for complete fools".

woMan's day

March 8th was forced by some freak to be celebrated as woman's day. It also is the birthday of one of my cousin sister's and so that is why I am reminded of it subconsciously even if I have a habit of forgetting friends birthdays. She has every reason to be proud of celebrating this on her day.

Apart from that, there is nothing special on this day. No not even woman feel great on this day because no one most men will not wish them. The only wishes they get are from the print and electronic media which are paid wishes. In the meanwhile I get a junk sms asking me to buy homes which costs 2250 per sq.ft. They don't know that I don't even have a bike.

Should be great to see chicks freaking out on this day hanging in restaurants and bars sipping orange juice or probably a cock tail. We are not talking about call center girls here. They drink blood out of a man. So what the activity will be like for a freshly graduated girl who is in her first-second years of her working life.


Chick A: Hey, why don't we hang out somewhere today?
Chick B: Yes, sure we can! But what special?
Chick A: Today is women's day yaar. You don't know?
Chick B: Oh really?! Yes, I heard it in FM radio.
Chick A: So where shall we go? ( she does not know where to go but she somehow wants to hang out today)
Chick B: You plan na. I am ready to come anywhere. Who all are coming?
Chick A: Yes, we can call Tina, Meena, Tana, Rana (they have nicknames which are sometimes male), Mona and all.
Chick B: Mona? ( na .. na..) Why her? ( see that chick jealousy today as well)
Chick A: Ok, we can leave her. I will call others and see what they are upto.

Chick A: Hey, howzz u? Why don't we hang out somewhere today?
Chick C: Yes, sure we can! But what special?
Chick A: (Uses some unheard expletives and gets on with the job). Today is.......

Finally a bunch of girls gets ready to hang out and creates the hype in office which no one could even imagine. The news spreads like wild fire and they become the most happening group in the office. "We are going to celebrate women's day at a restaurant", quips to her male team-mate who is constantly trying to woo her. "Congrats yaar, it is really nice of you to celebrate on this day. It is great that they you have a day on your gender. We don't have one", replies that pathetic male.

They go home and dresses to kill (whom? another woman?). You should look at the way they would sashay in the mall. Some unfortunate intelligent girl in the batch reserves a table. They would go there and talk bullcrap which is like candyfloss. Their words are so much that they contain no meaning.

Of the five chicks who are there at the table, two will be very close and would be talking to each other, one would be seriously sms'ing her boy friend (if he is not available, then she would sms to customer care with double the seriousness) and the other two don't like each other so they don't talk . Somehow one girl on whom everyone is jealous of sneaked into the party despite the initial plans to discard her.

They thought of spending the whole night till 9 p.m coz after 9 their PG gates will be closed. Next day in office: "Wow, we had a blast of a time" to that miserable male colleague who is all ears to know what they did yesterday.

Tv channels will be airing special programs, will be conducting contests and giving gifts, malls will give free movie tickets to women, special discounts on ladies products, pink rags are seen everywhere today and a poor lady will be shrieking her voice out in the FM radio all day to encourage her gender.


Everything subsides when they are married even more so for a man. The word woman contains a man. Important terminology related to women, starts with m..e..n.. Their celebrations are never complete without a man.

There is a reason why they do not have a man's day. Or even if there is one they've never created the publicity for they know what the outcome would be like from the ego bloated gender. Probably someone has created a woman's day realizing that the remaining 364 days in a year belong to a man.

Women would even celebrate more on Man's day than their day. The very thought of a Man's day brings smile on to the face of every man and the celebrations are all genuine. Men would really show to the fairer sex on what is the real meaning of "Wow, we had a blast !".

Febulous ?

I was wondering what was the thing that was forcing pathetic visitors to flood this blog. It is my images which are uploaded with proper description of tags. Another visit to my super hit post, Jim Corbett National Park trip, and I shall be selling it to Google to make a fortune. Joke for most of you Manufacturing Defected pieces. Most of the keywords (for ex: 'I want to know about Jim Corbett Park', 'entry charges to Jim Corbett', 'Safari ride in Jim Corbett') that are used to search for information about the Park is resulting in Google search throwing my post in the first page and at times in the first few links. Wow, isn't it?

Turning out to be a pig like lazy creature when it comes to uploading pics for this stupid blog. Thinking of uploading the same from my home but time constraint, you see. Also I do not have cable to transfer pics straight from my mobile to this office computer.

In my last office break, which was in the last week of Jan, I had been to many pilgrim places to attain moksha at such a young age. Covered many of the important pilgrim centers in India, thanks to my mom especially, who is a devoted religious woman. Me? Not like her but the essence of genes will be filtering for generations.

Getting pissed off oflate with my hairstyle which is not changing much after every hair cut. I am not liking my hair style. I am not finding it good.

"Lesser interest on yourself at the salon shop for whatever freaking thing you went there, means, you are getting older".

There is no clear indication than that. It means either you are loaded with responsibilities wherein you do not have time to bother about your looks or you din't do it last night. Time to change the stylist I guess. They don't say for nothing that you are only as good as your last hair cut. Just like that I used that phrase.

I've seen that much hyped movie 'My name is Khan' on the Friday it got released. You'd be more interested to watch golf for three hours than this dull Karan Johar's flick, where the lead protagonist played by shashasha Shah Rukh Khan reiterates, My name is Khan and I am not a terrorist. So, you are a Bollywood baadshah? Reviews said, some scenes put audience to tears. Why? Probably yes, for the gruelling execution of scenes where no character suited the role properly. Watch 'Ishqiya' and you will come out thinking ok fine from the theatre.

Apart from that, it has been this way on every Feb 14th........



...but surprisingly for once it has been like this on this 14th breaking the monotony.


Unforced Errors:

1. Days which you think will not come for you one day, will eventually arrive even though they are delayed.
2. If they've come and gone, then take Alan Wood's medicine. Blame someone else and get on with life.
3. India's test match win at Eden Gardens is being delayed first due to rain and now due to Dabur Amla's ton.
4. Ladies brains are more complex than their bodies. If you say something straight they won't listen. Don't know whether it is due to their bird brains or their inborn stupidity or stubbornness.
5. He..he..he..yet another male chauvinistic comment, yes.
6. Winter we felt was over early this year but it is chilly in the morning and in the evenings. Forecast by our meteorological department is as predictable as our cricketers.
7. SBI PO's recruitment test notification was released and being in a software industry you would always feel Government jobs are better but for the salary.
8. You would never want to blog from your home wasting your precious time.
9.
10. When you are in love, you don't see anything like point no.9, even though I typed something there.
11. Assumptions is the mother of all screw ups.
12. My best title of all my posts so far has just been coined.
13. Unforced errors should not always end in multiples of 5.

Jan news in Feb

I sometimes take pride in writing these posts in the sense, I had been able to maintain this blog for three years with a month's break only once. That is some achievement and I can only compliment myself and sympathise with pathetic visitors who have been hanging on this site since day one they have got this link. The template should be changed which I had been contemplating ever since I created this and it has been three years. But who has time? Even I started pretending that I haven't got time like you freaks.


I also feel I have got a style where I don't drill the point home digging nails one after the other into your bird brain. Takes someone with the opposite of bats to talk the way I had been talking with my limited knowledge and English. Sure, you can hang on other sites who scribble much better than what I do here, but because you are bored and nosey and want to know what's happening to this miserable freak who blogs three posts a month on an average, you've got no other option but to bear the repeated torture day in and day out.


When things go well you do not believe in horoscopes. When they go from bad to worse, you would get underpants wet and run for cover while con. Hence innocent Rock poses the question of the day, "How correct is to believe in horoscopes and proceed for marriages?". Till few days back I too had unwavering faith in this horoscope atleast for marriage. But today, I have relaxed a little on that front. Reason? I am getting younger. From parents front, no let off.

Another point if you folks haven't encountered any two contradicting statements from two astrologers. Each one will stick to his stand and states the other guy is wrong, just like two lawyers fighting in a court room with your father being the judge. Bang your head to the wall if you like the girl and your parents are adamant on the horoscope matching front.


What if an Indian guy marries a ethnic caucasian chic? What about horoscopes then? You do not know what is an exalted planet? I do not want to spoil your weekend.

How big are these traditions actually? I had a headbath today because it is Radhasaptami, birthday of Sun. Actually these traditions are big and we will be called wise if we shut up and follow them unless they put you under real trouble. There is a loophole and work around for everything. A hole accidentally happens to a helmet too.

Heading home for a week's break coz of no work here. It is my grandmothers one year death ceremony and we are supposed to perform these traditions for the Queen maker who studied only 5th standard but had a brain of a collector. You don't get these good habits overnight, they are inherited from your parents, grandparents and extra marital affairs.

Every time I travel in train either I get cold in the middle of the journey or I board the train with cold. This time, it is the latter. Time for early lunch coz I skipped breakfast today which is another dirty habit.

Unforced Errors:

1. One renowned tech-support MNC has break times counted in minutes. If you take a minute extra then you are spanked by the Manager.
2. If you put your head down and work, either you will be unnoticed totally and you would be perceived as a good attitude guy so you do not have any problem in the office or somebody else is going to play politics on you sooner than later.
3. Australian Open is underway and Rafa is looking threatening. Safina is probably competing with Rafa in the muscles department.
4. Once friends Google and Apple, are turning foes. Apple is even considering joining hands with its arch-rival Macrohard.
5. I've seen the second half of Shawshank Redemption so many times I am getting bored of this super hit movie.
6. US is called super power for nothing. It is one of those countries which is deploying massive aid and ground forces to Haiti vicitms where over 200,000 are believed to be dead.
7. When in cold, I feel more hungry.
8. You should have read this post as if it was posted 22nd Jan. Now I am back to where I am and I am alive and kicking and sucking and cribbing.
9. I could not post it on that date because there was an error in the posts. Hence the delay of 10 days. I have a freak as mate who has seven unfinished posts till date. I'm better that way.
10. What is a post without a dig on girls.

"Men would fall easily for girls who cry than girls falling for crying men."

or not for the end result has to be seen.

The Single Tea

The previous decade was not over in a flash but it took 10 years. Imagine you being in your chaddi days at the beginning of the decade and imagine now. Some change over the course of 10 years and some change over a span of 1 year staying abroad and some others will never change even if they roam the entire world.

I haven't taken any new year resolutions and I guess you haven't made the biggest idiotic mistake you could ever make at the start of a new year. Think where you yourself would like to see 10 years down the lane from now. The last time some one asked me where would you see yourself five down the lane, five years back, I've answered, I like to be in a good position in a good company, well settled, get married, possibly have a kid and thank god I ended blabbering there.

Here I am now after five freaking years that sped just like that with the current status-______-symbolically expressed in a picture.

The Single tea

If one likes to see what's making news, it is the Google Nexus phone, where web meets the phone bullshit with underlying Android platform. Cheap phone compared to orange's iphone with enhanced voice recognition features. Too early too call if it is the new in phone in the market, but it definitely should eat Apple's super hit phone's revenues by a good chunk. The adwords on which G followed by 100 zeros company generates 70% of its revenues, is making way into the mobile segment as well. This time that fruit company is not lagging behind and does not want to see this hi tech tech-geek company to be the adword leader in mobile segment as well. That is why they had acquired some mobile adword company and the war rages on.

Amidst all these, newly married Jack on mail, said,

"Girls are strong, though! If they love someone, they are gonna do it with all heart and if they hate someone, they do with all might. And if they decide to forget someone, it's a snap with a little finger".

Many of my friends had been at the receving end of the stick from girls including yours truly. So innocent Rock had his own point concurring to Jack saying,

"Men can neither dump girls nor can accept getting dumped that easily".

The debate goes on and the weaker gender (the ladies who cry even when they see a mosquito) should be boiling underneath to hang on to this male chavunistic site experiencing repeated abusing and emotional torturing.

I hope this decade will not be like what you had in the previous decade. I am not stupid enough to wish this decade should be bright, colourful, troublefree, three times a week shots or you should hit gold in every stock option you invest. I only wish it should make you a better person and me the best.

Unforced Errors:

1. Thought of elaborating on single tea but I defer the hammering.
2. Some guy used a deodorant so heavily and it was so pungent that I could smell that even with a sneezy nose.
3. The once attitude boy Virat Kohli accepted that he had toned down his behaviour which is why he is in rich vein of form in the ongoing triangular tournament.
4. Every time I take a picture, I quickly think of putting it in my blog, but I don't.
5. Fog here was so bad that the visibility was reduced to less than 100 metres at 8am couple of days back.
6. Casanova guy was happy last time that I haven't directed any UE's to him.
7. It gives one a sense of momentary achievement whenever they see their writing posted on their own stupid site.

For one story that is brewing in here which is caught in the mire of technology and tradition, one probable conclusion could be somebody's gonna get hurt real bad.