Unforced Errors

Because you stupid freaks are waiting for those errors more than the post itself, I'm straight away going for it rather than a tid bits sort at the end. As always there will always be one take on girls / ladies / bitches which you would like to know. Being a male blogger this is the advantage.



Unforced Errors:

1. If a lady reads the above lines, she will quickly come to a conclusion that I am a male chavunist.
2. You cannot enlighten a girl as you would normally enlighten a man. You should know the art of pampering. Drown yourself down the kitchen sink if you don't know the art.
3. Windows 7 was launched and the future of Redmond based empire is built on this latest release.
4. Cheerleaders looked hawwwtt in the stadium. Had there been no grills between them and the spectators, they would have been torn to rags by male pervert dogs.
5. A lion can do the same thing 15 freaking times in an hour to what you do once a day.
6. The Casanova guy is having a ball of a time with the next door aunty.
7. Changing the office building will not matter to few guys because their seats will always be allotted right in front of the main door.
8. Ceasefire days are still going on.
9. The other KP or the find of ACL is Kieron Pollard.
10. If you are still in your diapers, a lady talks on an average 21 freaking thousand words in a day to a man's 7 only thousand.
11. I've heard recession has come to an end or atleast the number of job losses have come down.
12. Air India has been under losses to a magnitude of few thousand crores of rupees and the company still does not decrease the air fare to rope in normal folks.
13. There are no muhurts for Hindu marriages till the end of April next year. So my best mate is getting married by the end of November.
14. Seeeriously is one word which ladies try to use often to which they indirectly mean they are not one bit serious.
15. You cannot find a Google news Science and Technology section without Apple's news. Google news is generous enough to throw few postive links on Microsoft's recently launched OS.
16. The word Google, Apple and Windows should have already made it into the Oxford dictionary.
17. Staring at the monitor or not moving from your chair does not mean you are a sincere and efficient worker. Companies know that but still they cannot get rid of that myth for some weird reason.
18. When ladies don't know how to work, they know what will work. Watch out for ladies falling over you to get the job done even though they know that you are gay.
19. Winter is picking up here and we are about to switch off the fans in the night.
20. Nobody knows what nutrients Serena used to develop a front that is as sizeable as her back.
21. The more you listen to my crap, the more you would be influenced by my words leaving your thoughts in your dressing room drawer.

My first Live Cricket match experience

My friends have just finished their lunch by cooking chicken and because I don't eat non-veg I ordered veg meals parcel from the mess. The delivery guy as usual comes late and it is now giving me a chance to bark on something which I've been procrastinating for a while. The fact that I've restrained blogging from the office is also a reason for such a gap between the posts, which you have not been longing for.


For the first time I had seen an International Cricket match in a stadium. One cannot really call a Champions League T20 match an International game, but it involves international and domestic players and hence it is a safe bet to call to call it, tock tock " " International. First match was between NSW vs Sussex Sharks and the other one was between Delhi Daredevils vs Wayamba Eleven at Feroz Shah Kotla stadium.

The first match was to begin at 4pm and we arrived as early as 1:30 pm at the grounds. Website says, one can get into the grounds at 2pm but when we reached there we got to know that we would be let into the stadium at 3:30 pm. @#$^&*@ of that sort came out and we went around the ground. We headed to Gate No.2 and luckily that was the moment when NSW team bus arrived at the stadium. We caught a glimpse of Brett Lee as he was sitting right at the front and was conspicuous for the people standing outside.


We saw few more players in through the window but not able to recognise coz they are domestic players. I met an English fan standing to collect his ticket at the online redemption counter. He was standing behind us and I told him he I could see Brett Lee. He quickly acknowledged that and pointed that Lee has a huge fan following in India, which I got to know when I went into the stadium. It was good to see him admiring Australian players even though he was English.


The online ticket counter from where they were issuing tickets was little bigger than a horse's hole and the service was ridiculously slow. People who came right to the stadium bought the tickets at the other counter and proceeded than the miserable ones who bought tickets online. If incase one wants to call the helpline number that was present at the website to obtain any information, the response would be "Please check the number you have dialled". I was lamenting that we should have taken our digital camera and I asked the guy next to me standing in the line, if it is allowed to take cameras inside. He confidently said 'yes' and he pointed me to the board that showed the list of allowed things to the stadium.


My joy had no bounds when the security guard told him that camera was not allowed inside. Don't know what he did and he also wore a hat to start with to protect himself from the sun. So we entered the stadium and we three room mates were excited for, it was the first time we were seeing a match and it is in New Delhi.


We quickly observed that watching a match Live in the ground is not even half as exciting as watching it on TV. But a T20 match will be interesting at the grounds because of the volume of boundaries that you get to see than a One-day or a Test match. Looking at the crazy screams by the fans, to which I am no exception, one can see why T20 will be gaining in popularity and attracting people all over the world. It is sheer entertainment and add to that , the DJ belting hit numbers till the bowler delivers the ball, which can sometimes be distracting for the batsmen, would also pump up the excitement.


People were really screaming for Brett Lee when he was bowling and even more so when he was standing at fine leg, which was closer to us . He really steams in when he bowls and with this ver second delivery he knocked of a batsman stumps. He leaped in the air and did his jig and the stadium erupted.


Crowds were screaming when Delhi came to bat and one can see the Indian cricket fanaticism when Sehwag was thumping the ball. Everyone was on the edge of their seats and Sehwag really does not hold back. Each delivery he faces is a totally new thing which he treats in his own way. We were lucky to witness a half-century by the Sachin look alike and Sehwag looked very relived after scoring a quick 50. I can imagine now what the fever would be like when Sachin Tendulkar takes guard and what it would be like when he thumps a ball straight drive down the ground of Brett Lee's pace. Thrilling and you would not stop raving about the little man.


We left the stadium after Delhi Daredevils innings and we made sure that Delhi would win with our golden legs present at the stadium for a do-or-die match for the locals. Once we reached home we turned the TV on for the second innings and normality was restored. We could immediately feel the difference.


Did I miss anything? The cheer leaders? They are gorgeous and as Arun Lal would put it they are 'Angels'. They really are cheering the crowd and they looked natural and were not pretending when they were doing their moves. Few girls will really test your hormone levels if you keep glaring at them incessantly. One need not be surprised if they find the excitement lesser without the cheer leaders. They really are a huge impact to this fast food format of the game.


Yesterday, I saw the same girls for the Bangalore vs Delhi match on the TV and I felt they are my friends coz I got connected to them. They can forget me but I cannot forget them.

I don't know why I am really nice to you when I do a third standard narration.