Jai Ho

Folks, thanks to all those who expressed their condolences over my Grandmother's loss and showed some concern over me. My thanks also extends to those lurkers who wanted to tell but kept quiet, which is why they are called lurkers for a reason.

I am alive and kicking now. I've not been publishing anything in B/R so you don't get troubled or bored by the sports shit that I write there. There is not much of tennis activity going on either in any case. So you are left unruffled.

But I do not understand the whole fuss that has been generated over the Oscars where A.R Rahman won a couple of them and Slumdog Millionnaire winning 8 in total. Those freaks who are thinking that it is a proud day for Indians because SDM won 8 should be drowning themselves down the kitchen sink. These are the possible reasons why it won and why you should not be proud.


1. It was directed by an English director.
2. The technical team was totally foreign. So the film comes under English film category than a foreign film one, where many movies would be competing for the best prize.
3. You should not be proud because it showed India in such a bad light and the fact that they showed India in such shape was really appreciated by Westerners coz it appeared real to them.
4. What those MF's don't understand is, anything that is shown in movies is partly true but it is little more than real, in the sense, it is not really real. They still like to see India as a land of snake charmers, slums, elephants, multiple Gods and superstitious people.
5. You nut heads won't understand that there will also be lobbying in Oscars. Hence I do not go gung-ho over those awards. There is no denying that there are prestigious but NOT everything.
6. Haven't you felt that A.R Rahman's score in this film was mediocre as compared to his blockbuster national and regional language hits ? This means that 'The Golden Globe Award' that he won days before the Oscar celebration has played it's part in bringing him the laurels.
7. Children were shown in filth and dirt which I did not enjoy one bit.

But our politicians were quick to take the credit and congratulated the awardees which is good for them. The demure A.R Rahman may not deserve this award but he really deserves an Oscar for the music he has composed and the trend set he has sent in Indian music industry over the years. This shows that you keep working diligently on what you know and one day results will come your way.

A.R Rahman

I'm also surprised at the sudden rush of visitors to my blog after that Roger Federer article. I don't know from where all there are heading in but would be glad if they have their presence felt in here. It's free mate to leave a comment. No, I won't trade your mail id's for anything to someone else, if that is the assurance that you are looking for.

The title is the name of a hit song in the movie SDM. In the morning I suddenly found a girl staring at me in the office, as if, she was waiting for me to smile. But me being a nut head put my head down and walked to my cubicle. What message did the genius A.R Rahman leave in his career? Do your best and leave the rest. Be it doing anything with girls, music, programming, screwing, playing or enlightening you dumb freaks. Jai Ho.

The reason why IPL is hurting me

On a timely basis whenever I post an article on Bleacher Report, you would be finding it here as well. That is because I do not want you to take delivery pains to travel so far to an unknown territory. This is the link again to see how I debated on it.
http://bleacherreport.com/articles/123636-the-reason-why-ipl-is-hurting-me#comments

It's back to big bucks, gorgeous cheer leaders, film stars gracing the event, younger cricket players getting to meet their screen icons, action heroes doing their bit to hog the limelight, and not the least—boundaries and sixes being hit at will.

I thought I was done with my cricketing viewing experience when India exited out of the World Cup 2007 in the preliminary round. But with no other sport really flourishing as big as cricket in India, everyone is forced to follow cricket and I am no exception. The interest rekindled in me when India won a closely fought Test series against Australia.

The IPL thoughts surfaced when India won the first inaugural T20 championships which were held in South Africa in September 2007, when they defeated their arch rivals in the finals. IPL was first launched as a counter measure when ICL was the first league to bring this sort of county championships into cricket.

IPL was the brainchild of Lalit Modi and he was credited for bringing and executing a novel concept with a huge backing from the BCCI.


Few teams with names ending with Challengers, Royals, Riders, Tigers, Lions (Sparrows and Pigeons were excluded so far) etc. were formed and are now funded by the corporate honchos and the big wigs of the film industry. A festival of colours, explosives and sixes is awaiting the cricket fans (real fans?) come the April 2009.

IPL 2008 was a huge hit and they are trying to at least double the success of it and cash in on it. Pietersen and Flintoff were traded for US $1.55 million which was a tad more than the uber cool MS Dhoni was traded for and nobody has any idea where the money is heading from.

Amidst this chaos there are few fans who are left wondering about this mayhem and man handling on cricket. They too like sixes being hit but not with ease and reduced boundary ropes. There were bountiful number of fours and sixes which were left unapplauded. Anything in excess vexes.

One day cricket was once a fans' delight is taking a backseat. And I for one will not be surprised if the purest form of cricket, Test cricket, becomes a part of the history. When players were able to stand the Test of cricket, I wonder whether Test cricket would be able to stand the test of time with such advancements and money flow in the game.

A batsmen who can hit the best of straight drives ever seen cannot find a place in the wham-bham, thank you mam cricket. A square cut hit in IPL will not be compared to David Boon's style. A half pull shot executed on one leg by a left hander is not admired.

The lazy elegance at which players hit their off drives and square leg strokes will be ridiculed because they lack the brute force. Commentators will be pressed to talk on how innovative a batsmen is for his switch shots rather than discussing the legality of it.

Being a cricket fan, who applauds a single over defended by Courtney Walsh to save the Test match for his team with more passion than six sixes being hit in an over, I begin to wonder where cricket and in particular Test cricket is heading to.

With torn heart, I for one do not support IPL just to keep the cricket alive—despite the fact that cricket is getting globalized.

"As a reminder to IPL and all it's crazy fans who called themselves as cricket fans - beep IPL and whatever body that is spoiling my interest in the game".

And yes, I am a traditionalist.

My toughest loss till date.

I was 11 when she started living with us after the loss of her husband. She taught us how to behave, she preached us her divine experiences, she joked with us, she shared her experiences with us and she was always one among us.

I was more associated with her, I feel, than my other two brothers. I was born at her house when she and her husband started spending their life after retirement. So I always have a fascination to her hometown. We all used to go to her house during our festival holidays. Once her husband left her she started spending her rest of her life with us.

She once had taken movie tickets for Chiranjeevi's movie in Vizianagaram for 'Muta Mesthri', when I could not obtain them after standing in the line for some amount of time. I desperately wanted to see the movie and she promised me that she would take me to that movie. She requested the security patron for tickets and the talk of the movie was buzzing with a 'hit'.The security fellow replied, "Why do you have to struggle for a movie at this age". She replied cheekily, "It's not for me but for my grandson who was adamant to see this movie before he goes home". He had no other choice but had to oblige her when he gave us two tickets in the front rows even though the booking counter was closed.

I was even fooled by her on April 1st when I was 19 years old. She used to give her blessings and money to the entire family to buy clothes on festivals. We used to wait for her money even though it was not so huge. She taught us how to get closer to God. She ingrained in us the values of life which would be laid forever strong in us.

"She was called "Peddakka" by her siblings and they used to seek her advice on everything and anything. No one ever had any answer to her. They all knew her words were worth their weight in gold. Everyone has to simply follow her whatever she said because they all know she was less selfish than the ones they had seen".

Her emotional and moral support would be unmatched by anyone. She studied only till 5th class but had a brain of a collector. She did not dare to study further coz she was afraid that she could not read what's written on the board sitting behind in the class. Yet, she was able to recite Sanskrit slokas easily. Her discourses and her standard dialogues are all preserved in our mind. Her unwillingness to accept things that she doesn't know reflects her childish nature. She always tested her English language skills when some told her a number in english.

She used to read few pages of "Ramayan" everyday and used to explain the story whenever we were interested. She advised us not to sit infront of her when was reciting Ramayana coz she used to believe Lord Hanuman would be present whenever someone chants Lord Rama's name. She was a big devotee of Lord Rama and Hanuman.

She used to get easily distracted when someone talks on family affairs even when she was reading Ramayan. Her stingy nature and her liking to preserve used things and polythene bags were special. She started liking sweets even more after she acquired Diabetes.She used to perform some special mantras which were unique to her when someone felt a pain in the neck or in the leg. Her never ending love and affection were matchless.

She lived 18 years with our family and we all are so blessed to spend some part of our life with her. That is why we all are so emotionally attached to her. She was my Grandmother (ammamma) and she breathed her last on Monday, 9th Feb 2009, at 1 pm. She was a Legend. The day she left was an auspicious one called "Maagha Pournima".

I pray that she does not have a re-birth as she wished and may her soul rest in peace.I love my Grandmother a lot and the mere thought that she is not there with us anymore is putting me to tears.

Poll is for nuts

So you have a website / blog and you want to take a poll on what your readers think of your opinion ? You found a script on the web and you paste in your blog, voila, you see the poll on your blog. That surely makes you happy.

I am here putting a poll to seek an opinion from you stupid freaks on this stupid blog for the first time. Ok, you don't become stupid if you answer this poll just because I called you one. You will become one if you do not answer this. Gotcha ?



I do see poll as a marketing strategy. And if you don't know, each poll response may give a revenue to the blog owner or the script owner even though it is peanuts. But little peanuts put together make a Snickers right ? You also know I did not put any ad in this blog for the sake of revenue. I am trying to keep it as clean as possible not from thoughts but from ads. I have to tell everything to you and you still have doubts on me.

Some people think the statistics that are obtained from the poll are god damn right. They are to an extent but basing on that alone and you tweaking your initial thought, makes you the biggest jerk ever seen on the planet.

But polls keep the reader interesting provided the question and answers are eye-catching. So with this as the only advantage I try to beg for your poll every now and then I hope you contribute often. You and I, forever, in the beautiful world ?

The day Roger Federer became a pussy

It was a day that would be more remembered as Roger Federer who turned into a pussy than Rafa getting the credit for his hard court Grandslam title. For the retarded, Rafa won his first Australian Open title this year and he has now a collection of 6 Grandslams at 22 years. There are die hard Roger fans who would ramble mindlessly over Roger's extremely low first serve percentage which was the key for the meek surrender by Roger in the 5th set.


Rafa played tough in the finals for over 4 and half hours with nerves made of steel and mind of non diminishing grit. He played a gruelling 5 hour 14 minute match, the longest in AO history, to register a win over his fellow Spaniard Fernando Verdasco in the Semi finals. Stepping into the finals everybody expected Rafa to be tired and some even thought it won't last long more than 4 sets. Rod Laver, John McEnroe, Pat Cash and yours truly (this is a chance to put my name alongside the greats) predicted Roger to win easily.

The moment match went into the 5th set I gave up my hope of Rafa's chance for a win. I was pretty sure that he cannot turn around this time and started browsing the web. To everyone's dismay Rafa won convincingly in the decider with some help from Federer who cannot kill the demons inside his cranium. A Rafa lightening struck Roger sometime after trailing Rafa 1-2 on serve in the 5th and then he suddenly started shanking his forehands and putting in uncharacteristic double faults. Nadal seized the set in no time and the finals was over without a dramatic finish unlike their last meeting at SW19.


Roger was asked first to receive the plate. He started confidently by saying,"Hey guys". The crowd roared and clapped. "Thanks for the support", he said. The crowd admired and applauded in jubilation. He then did the unthinkable. He put his head down, the crowd cheering, took a deep breathe and said, "God, it's killing me". No one knows what 'it' he was referring to. But everybody knew that precise moment that he was heartbroken. The guy was sobbing like no one has ever done on the podium. The tears of sorrow were flowing not like tap water from Indian municipality pipes but like water gushing from Niagara falls. He was wailing. Everyone including the dignitaries on the podium were dumbstruck. Rafa din't expect this kind of reception for his first hard fought hardcourt slam victory and obviously his celebrations were muted.


Rafa as usual, started his victory speech on the stage by saying sorry. The crowd din't like the apology for his hard earned title. It was evident the way they laughed after hearing it, instead of applauding it. No body knows why on earth he apologises Roger. Some say Rafa is humble. Some nut heads argue is he humble enough to hand him the FO title if they meet in the finals again.

The finals are now being remembered as the day Roger cried like a kid. He was unstoppable. It's as if he was literally begging Rafa by saying,


"Can you please get the hell out of my way till I achieve the coveted No.14 and No.15 slams. I do not know what else to do to counter your bloody top spin forehand to my backhand. You were running me ragged and I am feeling ashamed that I cannot cope that. I am the most talented player that ever since tennis has been introduced and you have been tormenting since you were 18. I am even afraid that you would take the GOAT status by winning slams on all four different surfaces. You've already won the Olympic Gold to add to my misery. Your game is not even half as good as mine and yet you were able to achieve the same reputation and stature as mine with lesser Grandslam titles punctuated with not even 50 weeks of No.1 ranking. 15 years down the lane when we both retire, people will be talking your name the moment somebody says Federer is the greatest ever. I can never digest that fact.


I thought I could sweep all corners of the world with my game, glamour, dignity, smile and grit. You have a fake smile and you can't even look straight into the eyes of the interviewer while talking. I thought we both had a mutual unspoken agreement that I won't take your French and you would not take my Wimbledon. You have violated it and are now taking my hardcourt titles as well. I would love to see you once struggling with your knees at my finals in the French Open'09.


I am a Leo and love hogging the limelight. I know I have loads of ego but it was never so evident on the courts. People mistook it for my humbleness which has done me a huge favour for my global fame. I am even getting ridiculed by non tennis people like this stupid Rock who minces no words and loves to see me getting beaten. Thirteen - Six is our head to head in favour of Rafa and I still do not know how much more he wishes me to lose. How I wish to see him cry after taking a dig on his weakness for programming? What more should I do to please the small minority of tennis fans who are not mine ?


I would not have bothered if you had all the shots in the book like I do. You have a ugly double handed back, some sort of serve that doesn't justify your muscle. You started hitting the ball really hard oflate and tennis is not to be played that way. You are hitting me now below the belt and I am unable to stand those blows. You don't even have fans crying for you after your marathon loss. I have ladies, gents and gays weeping all alike for my loss. I am such a tennis phenomenon which the world hasn't seen ever before and ever after my retirement, and that is why the mere thought I lost to some rusty lefty from Spain, is killing me ! "



If you want to see whether I received brickbats or bouquets for this article, then that can be found here:
http://bleacherreport.com/articles/119014-the-day-roger-federer-became-a-kittycat<

Yes B I

So what is getting under my skin for two days now. S-B-I. I went to bank yesterday which is right in front of our office to deposit some money and the Cashier says, did you not see the board which says only Rs.25,000 can be deposited in one go. So I scribbled a new form and deposited that much. I went again today a little early to avoid the queue which took 40 mins for my turn yesterday. The door is closed and the security guard says it is lunch time. Lunch at 2:45 pm ? Guard says they will be back around 3:10 pm. So I am back to office and blogging now in the mean time.


My Dad worked as AGM in SBI but he never violated the rules. He was one heck of a loyal employee with 35+ years of immaculate service to India's largest bank. These new chaps think they are everything with their ridiculously slow paced service. Everybody curses the bank but most of them would love to have an account with the same bank. And there is only one counter where they accept cheques, make DD's, deposit Cash, receive the payment for Application forms and what not. It is very easy for people to get frustrated with SBI's service. They love passing comments like slow network, govt service, dumb people, old employees etc. The logo too is as boring as the service.

There is one more thing that is irking me. Roger Federer lost in the AO finals to Rafa and he cried na ? People are still crying for his loss and are uncontrollable where as The Might Fed himself must have been relaxing in the Swiss Alps now. Govt. of India predicted that if ladies of such sort are shedding tears at such a rate, the low lying lands can be flooded soon in a week and the government is thinking of raising an alarm to the public to keep tax their related documents protected. More on Roger's loss in my forthcoming release.


For the time being I have to run again to that bank and check if my work is done before the bank closes by today at 4 pm. Yesterday in filling the form twice I forgot my pen there. I am hoping that I don't forget anything today. And I saw outside and inside the bank that there is no board that says only 25K can be deposited in one go. People in that bank like to think, "Yes bhai, this is SBI". Mate, I am coming to make your seat hot.